On The Tech Champion
In 2016, I was playing division-level collegiate basketball for Central State University, trying for my first ever ring and basketball victory. If we won, we being the Lady Marauders, would be the first championship at the school in the decade. Although I managed to lead my team to make it to the final four, I was very overwhelmed and had not led a team this far before. I’m being honest when I say, I was pressured and it was ‘win or go home’. After being told we had to earn our scholarships and play like we were on a 10 day, I couldn’t find any reason to sit around and just lose. I stepped up, I knew it was not all fun and games. That time of being in jeopardy of losing my scholarship, made me realize how poorly I was truly playing. I needed to step up my game if we were going to actually win a championship and if losing my right to play basketball was in jeopardy couldn’t help me see that, I don’t know what would. As soon as I knew what my fate was, I’m not gonna lie I thought it was slipping away from me. I thought basketball was a goner for me and it became really sensitive and personal. I really tuned in to what were my biggest moments of triumph, thinking of past experiences, thinking of previous losses, and how I never want that feeling again. I thought of moments when I was able to pull through and make it through whatever I was up against. The moments when you make it past the first round in the tournament are when you feel alive, that there’s hope left. I was able to display all the qualities of the champion: loss, not having the best season, being in one of the lowest positions in the seeding; there’s vulnerability near defeat; then comeback and final triumph. The triumphant memory was truly the moment I led us to the final four in the tournament. At that moment I knew I was safe from losing my scholarship or having to transfer schools.
In late November, I was placed on a Performance Improvement at my first tech role and I had a month to turn my performance around or it was ‘see-ya!’. I talked myself through increasing my production, seeking more help as a first-generation software engineer, and the feeling of “is it slipping away?”. I felt like all my hard work was at risk and I would be a failure, I talked myself through this experience. “Just keep pumping positive words affirmations in your psyche”, I instructed myself. “It’s not that bad, so keep going. You can make it. You’re not going to have a failure under your belt. You’re going to a triumph. This is your moment to shine and be a hero. This is your moment to be a champion.” I instructed myself all the way out of a PIP to victorious keep my awesome job at OfficeSS and be happy I can continue to develop great software. Honestly instructing myself using “You just have to stay glued to your keyboard. You have to put the time in. You just need the hours. 10,000 to master anything. You are right there. You are going to step up. It’s not your character to lay down or quit.” I truly have to say other than the moment I led my basketball team to a division championship in 2017, this was my greatest triumph. Considering the competitiveness of a production codebase, the ups and downs I was going through during boot camp, I really wanted to continue being a part of an intelligent tech organization. I was devasted, during the month-long PIP, I would just cheer on myself and encourage myself through affirmations. I also displayed all the qualities of a champion: the loss, the vulnerability near defeat, then a comeback, and a final triumph.
